Get Ready For More Police On The Subway And More MTA Delays!

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Great news for everyone who doesn’t live within walking distance of campus: your commute just got (even more) fucked!

The NYPD plans on increasing its underground presence by conducting “routine checks of trains,” Gothamist reports.

Here’s how it’s going to work: the train will pull into the station, the conductor will announce a momentary delay due to police activity, a team of NYPD officers will enter each car to make sure no one is currently being slashed, and your morning commute will take even longer than usual.

NYPD Transit Chief Joseph Fox has maintained that the increase in police inspections won’t lead to train delays. “The delay would just be a second or two, if anything,” he said at a press conference last Monday.

Given that trains are often delayed significantly by passengers holding car doors open for just a second or two, pretending they won’t be delayed by a group of officers peeking into each individual train car is pretty insulting. We’re all adults, so let’s be real: the trains are going to be delayed.

Our advice to you? Leave your apartment a few minutes earlier than you normally would, especially if you’re going to class or work, and don’t even think about going anywhere during the weekend. Or maybe just buy a scooter or a bike or something.

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