Local Stops: H.A.G.S. From Everyone Here At NYU Local

-The joy of finishing finals may be equivalent to the happiness felt by beagles seeing grass and sunshine for the first time ever.

-What’s cooler: This NYU hat or the “NY Train Project” by Adam Chang?

-Serious Eats ranked fast food vanilla shakes, because apparently Serious Eats like to drink boredom from a straw.

-Basics bitches run this city.

-There’s no such thing as free lunch – or free money for that matter.

The school year is over! H.A.G.S.

Photo of the Day by Caleb Savage


Local Stops: Brooklyn Dudes, Staten Island Wins, And Badass Fifth Graders

Former Local EIC Myles Tanzer has the new lowdown on the Jill Abramson debacle.

The Observer has put out an illustrated guide to Brooklyn guys.

Finally, Staten Island wins something!

A fifth-grader raised $200,000 to clean up the Gulf oil spill. What have you done lately?

Photo of the day by Caleb Savage


Local Stops: Obama Traffic, Eddie Huang, And Solange-Inspired Political Beefs

 

The traffic nightmares that come with the President being in New York for two days can only be categorized as an a(O)bomination.

Political beef explain by Solange and Jay-Z .gifs.

Check out the trailer for Eddie Huang’s new show, ‘Fresh Off The Boat.’

With the 9/11 Memorial Museum opening next week, the New York Times has a powerful interactive tour of the new exhibit.

Idea for post-final dance.

Photo of the day by Caleb Savage


Local Stops: Horrible Dudes And A Godzilla Attack

Someone is writing the names of Columbia University’s alleged rapists on bathroom walls.

Alec Baldwin was arrested today for disorderly conduct and riding his bike the wrong on 5th Avenue.

“He weathered the storm of irritations with his characteristic fortitude, eyes trained on his dog-eared Noam Chomsky reader.” Everyone needs to read this liberal dude erotica.

Batman does not look happy to be played by Ben Affleck.

“Godzilla would produce 12,921,400 gallons of urine per day.” New York City officials plan for a Godzilla attack.

Photo of the Day by Rishi Bandopadhay.


Local Stops: Speculate Wildly, Ginsberg

SPECULATE WILDLY why Solange attacked Jay-Z in an elevator! Are you Beyonce? Are we all Beyonce? Is this your business? Of course it is!

If you’re an oppressed migrant worker in a sweltering Middle Eastern city looking to contact your family, Coca-Cola bottlecaps now function as currency. In a PR move equal parts heartwarming and terrifying, Coca-Cola is setting up international phones intended for migrant laborers to contact their family. Price is a plastic bottlecap. It’s dizzying.

Poor Ginsberg. He’s our hero.

We might write this up tomorrow, but for now, former Local editor John Surico just did an amazing story on DeBlasio’s take on 2031.

What Would Happen If Saturn Came Really Close To Earth.”

 


Local Stops: Mariah Carey Is Amazing And John Sexton Is Rocking NYU Local Swag

Turns out those ultra-thin glove shoes you’re wearing may be doing more harm than good, so take them off already. You look like an idiot.

The prolific feminist theorist and author bell hooks called Beyoncé a terrorist during a recent discussion at the New School; don’t freak out, just read what she has to say (and check out hooks groovin’ to “Drunk in Love” despite her reservations).

Some geniuses at Time made a Mariah Carey album title generator: “Me. I am NYU Local…The Toilsome Prestidigitator.”

Community got cancelled. Tumblr is going to be insufferable this weekend.

Photo of the century, starring National Editor Joe Kozlowski and NYU President John Sexton, by Jackson Krule. 


Local Stops: Sorority Bacon, Preteens, And Entrepreneurial Ladies

Zac Efron, Seth Rogen, and Jimmy Fallon dressed up as preteen girls and no one was as concerned as they should have been.

Katie Cotton, aka Steve Jobs’ keeper, is leaving Apple.

A UConn sorority was busted for forcing pledges to sizzle on the ground like bacon. Wait, what?

Former NYU Local Editor-in-Chief Zoe Schlanger wrote this kick-ass cover story for Newsweek.

Photo of the day by Caleb Savage


Local Stops: Rob Ford, Fried Goodness, Eurovision, and the Amherst Diet

Rob Ford is in rehab. Rob Ford thinks rehab is the greatest thing ever. We love Rob Ford.

Fried Butter exists. But wait, there’s more.

We watched every single Eurovision song today. It was amazing and perfect. Eurovision is the greatest.

Amherst is now officially Frat Free!

Photo of the day by Rishi Bandopadhay


Local Stops: Grilled Cheese Parachutes, Racist News Programs, And Roberta’s Pizza

A service that delivers grilled cheese by parachute is coming to NYC. The future is now. 

This chart shows which rappers have the most varied lyrical vocabularies. For shame, Drizzy.

MSNBC aired this totally racist Cinco de Mayo bit, and now they’re apologizing for it. 

 Action Bronson goes to Roberta’s in the first episode of his new food show “Fuck, That’s Delicious.

Photo of the Day by Rishi Bandopadhay.


Local Stops: Lol Oops Four Posts Today


Funny when editors forget to Gchat they are stuck in thesis and law work! Anyway, double super extra posts tomorrow. Apologies to writers, nothing will ever make up for our coldhearted absence in your time of need. Reprimands to Adderall, you cruel mistress, warper of our attention, the wasp floating in the Bobst lobby. We expected better of ourselves. For the rest of you, here are links!

Lorde is on the social media warpath. She’s accusing a photographer of stalking her, and tweeted a photo of him. This will end well!

Do you watch the Big Bang Theory? Neither do we! (Operative quote: “He never saw it. He lived it.”) But 23 million people do. Here’s why.

It’s Monday, which means The Awl is feeding traffic with another hand-wringing essay about the Life of a Writer. You don’t want to read it, but of course you will.

Imagen New Yok Tiems wrote about @Seinfeld2000. We got bored of the account a few months ago, but not because it started to be anything less than hilarious. We just get bored! (Also the guy who runs it is from Canada.)

Speaking of Seinfeld 2000, Internet culture, Vampire Weekend, and the nascent intersection between nostalgia and immediacy that is rapidly becoming the lingua franca for our interminable lives, here is a thing.

(Image via)