CRIKEY: Nemo Is Coming For Us, Y’all

Last time a big storm slammed New York City, things didn’t end so well. Sandy hit just over three months ago, but you can still see her devastation all over the city: the Rockaways, Breezy Point, and Coney Island, to name just a few, are still recovering from the surging waters and high winds. And then came that other storm, because, well, why the hell not?

These days, though, we’re well into the depths of winter, and instead of lashing rains, a different kind of gift is on the horizon: snow. A lot of it. Judging by the forecasts, New York City is expected to get anywhere from 0 to 12 inches of the white stuff. Thanks for the tip, Weathermen! (Seriously, though, The Weather Channel is predicting at least six inches, and who are we to doubt The Weather Channel?)

Winter storm Nemo (yes, that’s right) is headed our way, and people haven’t taken the warnings lightly. The MTA was busy doing their duty, preparing the SnowJet and the SnowFighter for battle. Lines were long at gas stations last night, and according to Instagram user britsagoodlife, at least one Trader Joes was “bouncer status.” Even NYU got in on the action, sending out two emails to the community yesterday to keep students up to speed. The first reminded everyone to keep up with the school’s various communication networks, and the second stated that they hoped to make a decision regarding class cancellations by 6 am this morning. Well that decision wasn’t super fun because here we all are, going about our normal activities, angrily shaking our fists at this dumb rain-snow-sleet-shit.

Today, they’ve sent out a few more emails. Alison Leary is getting a major typing-finger work-out. The latest so far is that NYU will be canceling all university activities (aside from independent shows at Kimmel and Skirball) at 4 pm:

Leary says that we should try to get home early and “use [our] common sense.” But here at NYU Local, we think that a slightly more practical guide to surviving the second coming of Snowmageddon is in order. Below we’ve included some of our favorite snow-day activities, from those that speak to the five-year-old in all of us to those that…don’t.

1. Munching. A blizzard is the perfect time to stock up on all your favorite snacks, like popcorn, ramen, candy, and hot chocolate. There’s something about being stuck inside all day that makes us feel like hibernating bears, and what better way to pay homage to Stephen Colbert’s favorite animal than eat like one? (Bears, by the way, eat enough to surround themselves with a 100 pound layer of fat before hibernation, so get to it.)

2. Imbibing. So, you’re stuck inside, you’re out of food, and you’re thirsty for something to wash it all down. How about a White Russian? Or some hot wine? Or an entire kitchen full of beer? No matter what your drink of choice, Nemo is the perfect opportunity to indulge. After all, we’re the people who conduct scientific studies about the consumption of alcohol at school sporting events, so we know what we’re talking about.

3. Relaxing. Missed the last three episodes of Girls, or the finale of 30 Rock? Use this time to catch up on shows you’ve forgotten about (sorry, second season of Homeland) or have always wanted to start. Extra points if you make your viewing into a drinking game. (See above)

4. Gaming. What’s the survival of a major snowstorm without some red-blooded competitive spirit? Bust out some Bananagrams or Scattegories and go to town. Or, you could spend six hours playing monopoly, mourning the loss of the iconic iron gamepiece and cursing the cat that replaced it.

5. Adventuring. There are plenty of places to explore in New York City, and they’re made even better when there’s nobody else outside. Mid-snowfall is perhaps the most peaceful time in the city, when going outside is akin to waking up like Cilian Murphy’s character in 28 Days Later. Take advantage of the relative quietness and go sledding, photographing, snowball fighting, or, in the tradition of the greatest Nickelodeon show of all, ‘Hey Arnold,’ hijack a fire hose and make your own ice rink. (It may be a good idea to wait a few hours after your fourth White Russian, though.)

6. Sexy-timing. Just put this on.

In any case, be sure to have fun and stay safe out there in the snow (or in bed *winky-wink*). Leave your own suggestions and favorite blizzard activities in the comments below, and be sure to let us know how that ice rink works out.

[Image via.] 

 



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