Confessions Of An NYU Sugar Baby: Part 1

NYU “Sugar Babies” have become a thing of legend. We hear rumors they exist. We know someone who knows someone who dates one. But who are they, really?

If you’re new to the hype, NYU allegedly has the highest number of college “Sugar Babies” on Seeking Arrangement, a controversial dating website that matches young women with older, male “Sugar Daddies.” But what can they expect in exchange? The answer: money, presents, and the overwhelming security that love exists on AmEX terms.

Critics call it prostitution. Others say it’s a “mutually beneficial” relationship without the emotional price tag. According to Angela Jacob, a spokesperson for SeekingArrangement, “email verification” lists 750 Sugar Babies at the university to date. However, Philip Lentz, the NYU Director of Public affairs, refuses to acknowledge the claim:

“Any attempt to connect a thinly veiled prostitution web site and NYU is without foundation. There is no evidence to support the site’s claim about NYU students and any attempt to link participation on the site and tuition costs is completely specious.”

Seeking Arrangement has repeatedly been covered by major media outlets (last year we published an interview with their CEO). But what of the NYU Sugar Babies? NYU Local searched high and low to find some.

In Confessions of a Sugar Baby: Part 1, we caught up with Natalie Hill*, a student in Gallatin, who has been on the site since early September. She describes herself as a down-to-earth girl who knows how to have a good time, but makes sure to clarify that  “having a good time comes at a high price when living in Manhattan.”

So, you’re a Sugar Baby.

Yeah, depends on the day.

Why did you first decide to join the site?

It had always been a joke between me and my roommate, honestly. We got an apartment this year and bills started stacking up. I realized how much you start to spend on food without a meal plan. Utilities and student loans get real bad. I said, “Why not try it out?” I joined and a bunch of people started messaging me and viewing my profile. All of the sudden it became real. Their ages ranged from 30-55 and net worth ranged from $250,000 a year to $5 million.

But why not just waitress?

With a sugar daddy, you meet 4x a month and you can make $2000-$5000. It’s not enough anymore to wait tables and hope that your tips might pay the electric bill. Tuition rises every year, and every year, I don’t know if I will secure enough financial aid. It’s one thing to get into NYU and another thing to stay.

First impressions of the site?

There’s multiple sites like this, but SeekingArrangement is the best. I researched a lot and had an idea of what to expect. How to spot “fakes”—guys just looking for sex for money.

You mean they’re not all looking for sex?

There is definitely the undertone. Sex is the elephant in the room. You’re dancing around until the moment you can’t dance anymore, and you have to address it. I didn’t find many guys not looking for sex. Then again, I got one 60-year-old guy who messaged me and was adamant about meeting up. He was quoting Ralph Waldo Emerson and that’s what drew him to my profile immediately. I expressed that I am passionate about being a writer. You could tell he was very intelligent. Truthfully, he just seemed like a lonely man that wanted companionship—a man who wanted fun and intellectual conversation. Aside from him, sex is pretty much a given. 

How do you respond to critics who label the site as prostitution?

Understandable. I am still torn down the middle. I don’t know how I feel about it. After the first date (when we only even made out) I felt like I was walking around with a scarlet “A” on my chest. It will be forever debated until the site, if ever, gets shut down. 

What is the weirdest thing that’s happened to you on the date?

It was a Sunday night and this one guy invited me over for dinner. He was 33 and worked as a manager in I.T. We were going to watch some Sunday night football. The Saints were playing. After dinner, things moved onto the couch, naturally. He inched closer and closer and pulled the classic move of arm-around-my-shoulders. He lifted up my and literally began licking the inner contours of my ear. This is only the second date, and he’s mid-cochlea. I just had to get out of there.

Was this before or after you discussed a payment plan?

It was after, but discussing the pay was pretty awkward. He looked at me and I told him, “This is something we have to talk about.” He said with his last arrangement it was sort of unspoken and he’d just slip money into her bag. That way, things didn’t feel as much like a transaction. Now, I know that means that either a Sugar Daddy can’t afford a monthly budget like the others or he’s cheap and he doesn’t want to put a price on it. He told me, “I’m just helping you out financially while we enjoy each other’s company.”

How much did you end up getting?

Just a free meal and saliva to last a lifetime.

Describe to us your ideal Sugar Daddy.  

That’s a hard question. Obviously, one that wants me as his arm candy. One that pays me a monthly salary between $1,000-$3,000 a month. One that expects me to do fun, expensive things that I otherwise couldn’t afford. A partner in activities, without sexual encounters…but that’s impossible.

Female nirvana.

Exactly.

Why do you think NYU girls are most attracted to the site?

The high population of wealthy older men who are either married and unhappy or single and unhappy. The close proximity. Even if they don’t live in the city, they’re only a half-hour express train ride away. It’s a highly concentrated area with people who can’t afford to live here, like students, right beside guys on Wall Street with money to burn. Some of these guys just haven’t been able to meet girls.

How’s your moral compass looking?

Uhm … my moral compass was always quivering. It never settles down. Morals are subjective. In the case of being a Sugar Baby, I never quite have come to terms with it, and I still haven’t figured out if I’m going to look back and be like, “What the fuck was I thinking?” God forbid somebody digs into my past.

*name has been changed

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Comments

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    15 Comments

  1. Ryan Frank says

    I feel like it is my civic duty to point out how dangerous these sites are. I have a friend who went on several dates with several men from Seeking Arrangments. All was fine for the first few dates, she made a few thousand and it seemed like it was actually a lucrative decision… That is until she went on a date that ended with her being raped and beaten by a 300lb man…

  2. Wes House says

    WAIT, YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT BEYONCE IS A SEX WORKER SINCE SHE INSISTS THAT YOU GOTTA PUT A RING ON IT?

    Great insight

  3. says

    I have tried several sugar daddy dating sites but none of them met my expectations. Becoming a member of Seeking arrangement after reading about it in Der Spiegel online was a big mistake. The woman offer themselves like they are prostitutes and very cheap no class or style. I still haven’t given up. A friend of mine and fellow investment banker mentioned a new site. I hope that this one has more to offer when online. Maybe there is a difference between the US and Europe.

    Cheers,

    Markus (Germany)

  4. Lauren Prince says

    I’m so disgusted by things like this. Good for you, you’re using your most base, shallow skills to steal money from vulnerable old men. Excuse me if I don’t pat you on the back.

    How about you don’t go to a school you can’t afford and then you don’t have to mortgage your dignity for a degree in comparative literature that won’t get you a job in this economic climate anyway?

  5. Natalie Hill says

    Ms. Prince (or should I say Princess?),

    Thank-you for your kind and well thought out comment. I am the ‘sugarbaby’, being interviewed above, and just wanted to clarify a few things. There is no stealing, sweetheart. It’s merely a transaction of good company, possibly a dinner and drinks, and companionship for a set price. Each arrangement is different, and depends on the type of woman you want to be portrayed as. As for dignity? I think it’s nice to be pampered every now and then by an older man who thinks I’m beautiful. Call me shallow, call me a baby prostitute, or call me exploiting my good looks and economic intelligence, that’s for you to decide. As for the pat on the back? I can’t imagine your angelic hands stooping to my depths of subhumanity to even pass me a tissue. So thanks anyways.

    And for your information, you know nothing about my financial situation or my major. If you had read the article thoroughly, you would have seen that I go to Gallatin.

    Now if you don’t mind, my corner needs tending to..

    Warm regards,
    Natalie Hill, Lady of the Night

  6. Lauren Prince says

    “And for your information, you know nothing about my financial situation or my major. If you had read the article thoroughly, you would have seen that I go to Gallatin.”

    Actually we do know about your financial situation, since you know, there’s an article about it if you scroll up. And the fact that you’re in Gallatin is even funnier – congrats on pimping yourself out for a made-up degree that no one even takes seriously. I’m sure your parents are real proud sweetie.

  7. Missy Daisy says

    My problem isn’t with a Sugar Babies’ dignity or a Sugar Daddy being taken advantage of. It’s obviously a competent choice made by both of them.

    But I find this extremely anti-feminist, especially where the interviewee agreed with the interviewer’s postulation that her ideal encounter would be “female nirvana”. Yes, because the height of female achievement is having an older man just give her money and pay for her to do expensive things with him. Sexism.

    And I don’t know about her financial situation, so I’m not passing judgement- everyone does what they can to get by. But I’d love to know if there’s a similar service for those financially challenged young men that are facing the same hurdles at NYU.

  8. Leah N says

    Lady of the Night,

    Times are rough and you are doing what you have to do. Amen to you! Plus, you are doing it to get ahead in life through an education. I just recently went on SA so I can afford my tuition. Apparently, working a full time job isn’t cutting it anymore and being a waitress won’t cut and cuts into my studies.

    Would love to communicate with you in private.

    XOXO,
    Hakuna Matata;)

  9. Colleen S says

    To answer your question Missy Daisy, the site Seeking Arrangements isn’t just for young girls and wealthy men. The sugar babies are male and female. Plus there are sugar daddies and sugar mommas. On the site they say if their looking for male, female, or either one.
    And Lauren, you probably should stop being so self-righteous. Its her life not ours and she can do what she wants with it. Sex isn’t a crime. Plus, I personally don’t consider this prostitution. If the man was just looking for sex he would find some crack whore on the street. But instead of that he wants companionship, an educated woman he can actually talk to, as well as have sex with.

  10. Danielle Beaucourt says

    I actually came across SeekingArrangement.com on one of Dr. Phil’s episodes (post surgery boredom I know) . As a recent grad, I am still looking for a full time job (unlucky I must say) and very short on cash reserves. I have friends who have sugar daddies and it’s fun to go out with them and their “boyfriends” as they pick up the tab for us in group settings. It’s kinda like I vicariously live through them. I would personally never go on these websites because pictures/information you write about yourself can backfire on you in the future and the internet can become your worst enemy in terms of exploitation. With that said, I think it’s crucial for girls to meet with guys only in public places.

    I see the seductive part in this especially if it’s very much a Christian Grey type. Being that I am 23 years old I feel like this is my generation’s dirty secret. I have 2 really close friends one who has had multiple sugar daddies and another who became an egg donor and got a juicy $8,000 check. Tough times really

  11. Lady Indigo says

    I too was a Sugar baby from the ages of 22-26. I had an extended relationship with a man 17 yrs my senior with whom I’m still friends today. He was single at the time and is now married. He showed me some of the best times of my life. I could ask him for just about anything and he got it. I had to end the relationship when his feelings got involved and he wanted to have a baby with me. I knew then it was time for me to move on. I do not regret being his Sugar baby at all. He is a good man and I will always remember him.

  12. Melissa Casting says

    I am a Casting Director trying to get in touch with some self described Sugar Babies or women who have made arrangements similar to those mentioned in this article. I would love to hear your stories. Please feel free to email me or pass my address along to anyone you know leading this lifestyle: melissa.casting@gmail.com

    Thank you!
    Melissa