On Campus - by Kenneth Hsu on Wednesday, October 7, 2009 15:33 - 10 Comments - 1,232 views

Bobst Library Reveals Its Filthy, Insecure Mind On Twitter

3892751375_6460e07310Ever wonder what Bobst Library is thinking when you’re inhabiting its lower levels and riding up and down its midsection? Well, fantasize no longer Shattered lives download. @NYUBobstLibrary is on Twitter and he isn’t holding back. At all. We’re warning you, Kimmel and Silver.

Here’s a tweet about Elmer’s thoughts on his body structure:

  • “I may be a building but that doesn’t mean I don’t have an awesome set of human genetalia. Ps. Come inside of me.”

And on his sexual desires:

  • “I WANNA HOLLAH FOR A DOLLAH, GET SOME PUSSY FOR A PENNY- I DON’T CARE IF SHE GOT AIDS.”

Of course, @NYUBobstLibrary spares no remorse for other NYU buildings. Freshmen, cover your ears:

  • “Thought I bought sum coke frm the waverly buildng but it turnz out THAT SHIT WAS JUST CRUSHED UP BIRTH CONTROL. Bitch I want my money back”
  • “nvm, gunna get laid by hayden. what a SLUT. hollah at silver though, i know that motherfucker is there.”
  • “I tried on my fat jeans nd they were 2 small.I rly need to hit da gym. Maybe Rubin will go running wit me. Rubin has huge tits. Bouncebounce”

But reading between Elmer Holmes’s vulgar language reveals a sense of insecurity and loneliness. Here at NYU Local — where we use the library only to hold meetings, no more — we wonder what exactly lies inside the barren cube of Bobst Library. Telling signs:

  • “YO BRITTANY HALL Why ain’t you returnin my txts?? I knw ur gettin them. My big red brick heart is straight up breakin. Imma be single 4evr”
  • “I know you may think that I’m easy- but I’m still a library and I have serious emotions. And also serious opinions- about health care even.”

For questions and concerning regarding personal health and safety, please call the NYU Wellness Exchange at 212-443-9999. We’re here for you, Elmer!

Note: @NYUBobstLibrary is not to be confused with @bobstlibrary, which appears to be the Twitter account for an actual library.

Photo by Flickr user uraimo used under a Creative Commons license.

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10 Comments

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Natan Edelsburg
Oct 7, 2009 16:48

Hiarious! This is “Twitterjacking” at its best.

Nicole He
Oct 7, 2009 17:01

This is the best and worst thing I’ve ever seen.

Nicole He
Oct 7, 2009 17:04

IS THIS TAO LIN????

Margaret Smith
Oct 7, 2009 17:16

Yep, @bobstlibrary is staffed by librarians at Bobst. You can follow it for news and events, and you can ask us if you have a library-related question or need help with research. We’re also on chat and SMS:
http://library.nyu.edu/ask/

Cooper Cheatham
Oct 7, 2009 19:16

Oh no! It’s no longer active! IT made my time in bobst that much greater!

David Alvarez
Oct 7, 2009 20:56

It/he/she started following me on twitter.

“Grey sweater guy on the 8th floor- why are you sitting alone at a table? Do you smell bad or something? #HOLLER8THFLOOR”

Lol.

NSFW: Someone at Bobst Wants to Do it in the Stacks | NYU Local
Oct 9, 2009 16:29

[...] to the horribly crass (and incredibly amusing) @NYUBobstLibrary for the heads up. [...]

Amuse Yourself with the Exploitation of Embarrassing Tweets | NYU Local
Oct 12, 2009 10:02

[...] are based on the frequency of certain words that appear in their tweets. The application deemed NYUBobstLibrary 28% hetero for using the words “bitch, emotions, shelter, gym and gay.” NYU Local [...]

Culturally Relevant Halloween Costume Ideas: The Good and the Lame | NYU Local
Oct 22, 2009 12:04

[...] grew so tremendously popular this year that even Bobst decided to get in on the clusterfuck. Unfortunately, it seems as if the shoddy servers that manage the site [...]

Maggie Munoff
Oct 24, 2009 16:54

Amazing. I love it, I always wanted to know what Bobst thought in his most private moments.

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