National - by Josh Becker on Wednesday, November 4, 2009 12:03 - 17 Comments - 2,562 views
Well, here we are: 0 for 31 Lonely hearts download. That’s gay marriage’s track record when put up for statewide referendum in this country, which is to say, in 31 states that have put the issue of same-sex marriage up for vote, it’s been voted into illegality every single time. Maine was supposed to be different. So was California.
Some people are claiming this as a sign, as a resounding referendum on this nation’s views of same-sex marriage. You know what? It’s hard to argue with that. Gay marriage isn’t gay rights; it’s the thorniest splinter of the thorniest national social issue this side of abortion.
That’s an important distinction. Those who worry about the “silent majority” of gay rights opponents, the people you rarely meet in the city but see in the news holding signs and public prayers, have little to fear. America does not oppose gay rights. Or, to be more specific, a majority of this country does not oppose ensuring that queer citizens receive the same rights as anyone else. That’s a fact, yes.
I was really sad about Maine; in a way, sadder than California, because Cali was such a national moment, where God’s children screamed at San Francisco loud enough to bring fear back to the state. Coming on the heels of Barack Obama’s election, nobody really had time to feel sad about California. Sure, some of us were disgusted and appalled by the results, so disappointed to see California vote to deny its gay citizens the right to marry. But it was the dawn of a new day! Obama would walk into the White House, so many of us believed, and with a wave of that magic wand he used to rocket himself to victory in the election, he’d make this country understand that gays and lesbians were alright.
But maybe it’s because of Obama, and this tumbling economy, and the ever-increasing encroachment of national chains and virtual networks on the dying face-to-face communication at the small corner store, that so many people remain fearful of gay marriage. It can’t really be about letting gays get married; that affects nobody but the grooms and wives waiting to do so. Rather, I think opponents of gay marriage — and even, perhaps naively, gay rights — are just scared to lose something else. Gay marriage’s passage would prove their values’ irrelevance, another nail in the coffin of the religious caution that kept this nation safe for so long.
I think gay marriage will be a political reality one day. It’ll happen in our lifetime. We, the younger generation that has already made so many mistakes, still seem to know better. But waiting for the Old Guard to die out is a passive solution to a problem that demands action. We’ve been going about this all wrong.
Gay marriage opponents in Maine weren’t attacking homosexuals; rather, they were championing a preservation of the traditional paradigm of state and church and family with which they, and their parents, and their parents’ parents, grew up. It’s not about convincing people that the tides of society are changing and that it’s time to accept gay marriage; rather it’s showing people, the people that voted Yes on 1, that gay marriage won’t change their lives at all, except for the fact that their children would be able to marry whomever they choose.
17 Comments
John Lempka
David Plylar
My understanding is that a little over 50% of the eligible voters in Maine actually turned out to vote on November 3 on Prop 1. I would bet that there were a sizable number of LGBT community members who did not vote in this referendum. Voter apathy cuts across all demographic lines, including LGBTs.
In Texas in 2005 less than 20% of eligible voters turned out to vote on a one-man-one-woman marriage amendment to the state constitution. The LGBT community lost out on that vote. If 100% of the gay rights voters actually went to the polls, we would have won that referendum hands down.
@John: But to me, that’s the worst part. Gay marriage really doesn’t affect anyone but gays, but it’s in the hands of the entire voting populace, straight and LGBT alike.
Rod Gamel
The fact that gay marriage has been shot down every time it is taken to the polls should say something. Those that believe in traditional marriage have spoken again and again and again. If the LGBT community is so set on being joined together try coming up with a different name for it, clearly the term marriage is taken. The term has roots to deep for to many people to just be changed. Marriage for many represents not just a union but an idea of what the union should be. Give up the term marriage because it is already taken and for the thirty first time the people have spoken and we are not letting it go.
Chris Kennedy
from a political science perspective, voting methods are so innately biased and easily manipulated that it is quite a stretch to say that “the people have spoken.”
Abortion is a perfect example, where close to 85% of Americans support some form of abortion rights, yet in the Media, and in referenda and legislation, it seems that Abortion is much more divided issue. It’s not. I suspect the issue of Gay Marriage is quite similar.
I am a married gay man in Californina. I married my partner of 20 years in between the Supreme Court decision and the election last year. It was the most significant and joyous day of my life. I was also an activist against California’s Prop. 8. Before this election, I read in the Advocate that the anti-Prop. 1 people were mounting an ad campaign that focused on Maine citizens’ sense of fairness. As I read that, I shook my head and predicted the passage of this measure. California’s gay rights organizations made the same mistake, wasting thousands of dollars on fuzzy, feel-good ads. The other side’s campaign was all about fear, doubt and lies, lies, lies. Appealing to the higher nature of voters with this kind of issue will always lose. People vote their fears. Some fear change, some fear gays in general (because they think they don’t know any). IMO, we need to call out the lies, and present the scary prospect of theocracy — having our laws being written by Cathoics and Mormons. (For those who take exception to the last statement, FOLLOW THE MONEY!)
Archcomix by Dan Archer » Archive » Last Page of Diego Garcia and what happened in Maine?
[...] right to return to their homeland. Speaking of tragic outcomes, after a massive turnout in Maine, prop 1 was passed yesterday banning same-sex marriage in the state. I’m thinking of doing a piece on the money trail behind the yes campaign – which also worked [...]
Jon Payne
Voting has no place in civil rights decisions. The public at large is dumb, ignorant, bigoted, naive, stuck in the past, and close minded…and dangerously religious.
Jon Payne
@Rod: The meaning, definition, and values associated with “marriage” have constantly changed throughout all of recorded history, from civilization to civilization, culture to culture, nation to nation. “Marriage” is not an absolute term — it never has been and never will be. Nor do people who oppose gay marriage have a monopoly on the term. Who cares if the roots are too deep for the bigots? The roots were said to be too deep for the bigots who based everything on skin color as well…that clearly changed, for the better I might add.
Rod Gamel
Jon you are one angry man. I’m guessing that you don’t take losing to well. I would suggest moving to a place were the public at large is dumb, ignorant, bigoted, naive, stuck in the past, and close minded…and dangerously religious, It might be difficult finding a place were the people think the exact same as you and have no variations from your view point. But when you do find that place i would suggest calling it homosexual heaven.
Rod Gamel
sorry that is supposed to be: were the public at large is not
Jordan Budd
Rod, are you suggesting that people who are against gay marriage don’t hold a “dumb, ignorant, bigoted, naive, stuck in the past, and close minded…and dangerously religious” worldview?
Other Election Results from Tuesday | NYU Local
[...] and Kenny have already noted the passage of Prop 1 in Maine and Bloomberg’s narrow victory earlier this week, but there were some other noteworthy races [...]
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Margaret Khan and Lisa , 26Dragonflies. 26Dragonflies said: @flaminglezzies http://bit.ly/37oBqM [...]
rochesterturning.com » Blog Archive » Maine 1, Human Rights 0
[...] “Nobody’s rights are secure until everybody’s rights are secure.” From the NYULocal, yesterday: I was really sad about Maine; in a way, sadder than California, because Cali was such a national [...]
Rod Gamel
Jordan I don’t think the public at large is all those. I do think it is funny that Jon calls a large group of people bigots because they disagree with you. If google is right then the definition of bigot is: a prejudiced person who is intolerant of any opinions differing from his own. So taking a second look at the post who sticks out as a bigot?
Maurice
How is it we, the sane, logical and compassionate, continue to tolerate these disgusting conservatives with their antiquated and draconian perceptions of society? I cannot understand why the government is shuffling their feet on this, which in all reality is a non-issue. The masses absolutely have no right to decide on civil rights(personal) issues. I have had it with these small town values, religious, conservative types. Those who actually value freedom for all have been left with no choice but to repel, at all costs, these backwards, and ultimately, dangerous schools of thought.
@Rod:
You even mentioning that someone is butt-hurt because they “lost” is a huge sign of what’s wrong. Too many think politics is some kind of team sport where all they want to see is the other side lose, an opposing player hurt, or a wreck. In politics, as sports, you have an overwhelming number of people who do not or barely understand what is going on that participate, unfortunately. These uninformed people choose sides, cheer for their team or issue, and in the end forget there are actual lives at stake. The issue of gay marriage, abortion, alcohol, guns, marijuana, stem-cell research and a host of personal non-issues have been dumbed down to this.
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I think that it may be fair to say that America doesn’t oppose gay rights, writ large, or gay rights as a notion, but at the same time I think it’s hard to argue against these results making clear the electorate’s opposition to equal rights. And I think that it is exactly is about letting gays marry, and that ‘banning’ gay marriage does affect straight people—straight people who have no interest in losing status as privileged citizens.
The line that gay marriage doesn’t affect anyone but gays makes straight people sound like innocent bystanders.