While some of you upperclassmen may be in what you like to call “serious, committed” relationships and few of you freshmen may find you’re still dating that same pizza-faced kid who took you to prom, there’s undoubtedly a large pool of us here at NYU who are left boyfriend-less or girlfriend-less (but mostly boyfriend-less) after winter break. While the fluctuating temperature is more often than not a shock to the system, the strain of winter break on budding relationships (especially between two hormonal college students) is often overlooked. As we return to the city after spending a month at home only to curl up in our cozy apartments and dorms alone for Valentine’s Day, slowly we’ll come to realize that maybe that “thing” with that “dude” before the extended holiday really wasn’t so bad and was actually, oh my god, enjoyable.
As you settle in to the third week of classes, it’s time to shift your attention from academia to romance. If you haven’t already, you definitely don’t want to start off the semester by sending a drunk text to some dude you used to fuck, asking him if he’s back in the city.
If you’re actually interested in making him your boyfriend, try not to seem too excited. You know, play hard to get. Honestly, him texting you first is optimal, but not always the case. If you feel the need to make the first move, check his Twitter and casually bump into him at the Think Coffee on Mercer or whatever pseudo-trendy café he usually frequents. If he doesn’t drink coffee or have a Twitter check out his Facebook to see what bars he’s been visiting recently. If he hasn’t contacted you, and texting him “Sup?” makes you too uncomfortable, try making the first encounter seem as accidental as possible. If this sounds crazy, well you’re probably right, but our Netflix accounts are getting old, and c’mon – you totally social media stalk that kid you’re crushing on already.
Once communication has been reestablished you should know pretty quickly if the boyfriend transformation is feasible. If he says something along the lines of, “I don’t want a girlfriend/boyfriend,” don’t start asking your friends what they think he means because there is honestly no room for interpretation there and he really just doesn’t want to date you. Help yourself by getting over it as soon as possible.
If, however, you find that you’re spending every night together after going on dates where he pays, it might be time to have that talk about exclusivity because let’s face it: the only difference between a boyfriend and some guy is who else he’s having sex with.
But as we all know relationships aren’t always that easy and sometimes it’s hard to get a read on where you stand. Let’s say, for example, sometimes he takes your calls and other times he ignores your text messages for days. The best thing to do at this point is to try and make him jealous. Upload a couple of extra pictures to Instagram featuring you and your friends being outrageous or something. A month is a long time to be apart, and if it wasn’t so serious to begin with, you definitely have to get his attention now.
Whether that means you need to get a haircut or start going to the gym, be sure to make moves quickly. As today marks the last day to transfer into your beau’s classes, the point of it’s-too-late-to-contact-him is rapidly approaching. If you don’t want to become just another number in his contacts, start doing what you can to get your groove back immediately. After all it is the semester of the boyfriend and it gets lonely in 12 inches of slush and snow.