Oh my god you guys, Justin Bieber got his first Grammy nomination this week! Congrats to the little man who joined the ranks of artists like Arcade Fire (album of the year!), Eminem (who will win almost everything if not for…), Lady Gaga (the hopeful winner of practically every award).
Taylor Swift doesn’t have a single nomination, that’ll be next year when she goes up against Kanye West (both of their high selling albums came out after the 2010 deadline). But who can you get mad at now that The Biebs has finally gotten his credit? Oh don’t worry, your rage will boil when you see who the Grammys put up for some of the shiny gold trophies. Here are the worst Grammy nominees of 2010.
“Teenage Dream” by Katy Perry for Song of The Year
The song with lyrics so bad that they managed to spawn a meme on Tumblr is nominated for Song of the Year. Anyone can listen to this song and realize that it’s not even in the same category as some of the other songs on the list (“F*** You” by Cee Lo anyone?!). This song is a piece of trash, and I’d rather see her song “California Gurls” get nominated — at least it’s catchy.
“Graffiti” by Chris Brown for Best Contemporary R&B Album
Chris Brown’s comeback album was one of the biggest creative and commercial failures of the past year. Lame singles and weak ballads made it one of the worst albums of the year for sure. Besides the remix of “Deuces” and his cameo in this great video that came out last week, Chris Brown’s career is down the tubes, and he didn’t deserve this nomination.
“I Dreamed A Dream” by Susan Boyle for Best Pop Vocal Album
If you watch the performance that SuBo gave on The View this week and still think that she should be nominated, then you’re probably one of her nine million cats that she left starving in England while she went on tour.
Dr. Luke for Producer of The Year
Have you ever seen “Josie and The Pussycats”? No not the good cartoon, I’m talking about the horrible live-action movie with Rachel Leigh Cook. No? Neither have I, of course, but my friend told me that in the movie they have evil producers that put subliminal messages into the songs that make teenagers turn into mindless zombies. The evil Dr. Luke must have gotten his hands on one of these machines. He’s produced “Party In The U.S.A.” and “Tik Tok”. Case Closed, excuse me while I try and get these two hits out of my head with a screwdriver.
“XI” by Bear Creek for Best Native American Music Album
Bear Creek has gotten so commercial with this latest release. It’s like the musical version of “Dances With Wolves” or something. Stick to your roots guys, make more of your old stuff. Nothing will ever beat “Through Thick and Thin”. NOTHING. [Ed. Note: Myles knows nothing about Native American music besides that one time he went to a trip to a wigwam in the third grade].