Entertainment - by Mike Vilensky on Wednesday, April 15, 2009 13:00 - 14 Comments - 68 views
MTV’s latest reality show College Life ups the ante on authenticity, giving four freshman at the University of Wisconsin handheld video cameras with which to document their lives. And just like real college life, the show is messy, anxiety-inducing, and hard to follow. Oops—it looks like the kids forgot to turn on the camera at pivotal moments, so the choppy editing weaves together narratives even less compelling than those of fake-reality.
But, if only because it’s the next best thing to having produced this show ourselves—(ahem, this writer may or may not have once carried around a video camera freshman year only to lose/burn the tapes later in life)—we’re going to watch anyway.
Onwards, then.
Jordan: He’s got MTV’s bases covered as a half-black boy who doesn’t like the “mob mentality” of campus life and can’t wait get away from his “parents’ rules” and his religious suburb. If one of them rediscovers his sexuality this season, we’re guessing it will be Jordan. Jordan’s mama cried when he took off and told him to “be good” and he said “I will.” The foreshadowing! Seriously, mom, stop this kid. Thus far, Jordan struggles with forming new comfortable friendships because of his mixed-race identity.
Andrea: She’s a Wisconsin-born Christian virgin with the heart of a whore. We predict she’ll lose her virginity and then some. This week, Andrea tries to define her relationship with her meaty ex-boyfriend, Jordan, who, we are constantly reminded, never sealed the deal. Jordan isn’t sure he can be friends with Andrea, since she’s so slutty, strangely, even though she’s a virgin. “When I tell a guy that I’m a virgin, I become somebody to conquer,” she says. And she may be right, because Jordan is still saying things like “You’re my property,” and, finally, “I’m sick of the way you treat me!” All while he chugs apple juice from the bottle, which we have to admit did hit a note of honesty, that odd cross between adulthood and adolescence that is college life. Sigh.
Alex: The hippest and prettiest of the bunch, Alex is already scarred from some past relationship. She says she has “trust issues” and we predict she’ll get debilitatingly depressed and drop out or transfer. In fact, she’s already gotten fucked over and “feels like a worthless piece of shit.” Cheer up, kiddo! You’ve still got three years of this ahead of you.
Kevin: Your total dude! All-around guy! Go Wisconsin! Kevin’s tiny dorm room is “party central” until they get busted. All of which reminds this writer of his freshman roommate who rarely showered and encouraged floormates to take brief peyote trips in the room, all while this writer planned his getaway, eventually moving his stuff a few floors down one day, entirely unannounced. (I’m sorry! It wasn’t you! It was just a bad living situation, okay?)
Ah, freshman life! This accurately chaotic show reminds us: we don’t really miss it, after all.
14 Comments
Sam & I watched this together and the title of this post is exactly what we said. It’s so true. This shit was soooooooooo fucking boring.
Sweet D
I haven’t seen this show yet I wonder how “real” it really is. I really hate how MTV has a token black person. You would think that by now, they would realize you can have more black people, really it’s okay, no one will be mad at you. It doesn’t surprise me that this show sounds borring though. I went to UW-Madison and the people, though not all of them, but a large majority of the people and professors are very pretentious. The parties and Mifflin St block party is always a good time. We definitely know how to party but I don’t think that’s a good message to send to kids either. I’ll stop back after I actaully watch this show =)
Good artical by the way Mike. You’re good at writting!
Josh Becker
I, um, really liked this show.
Just saying.
Sweet D
Okay I watched the show…..I’m so glad I have DVR so I could FF through the 5 minute long commercials just to get back to this show….wait what is this supposed to be about again!? So there’s a very excited boy who likes to drink a lot, I’ve dated too many of this kind of boy. Then there is the quite boy who hails from Illinoise. He just seemed borring to be honest, nothing sparked my interest in him what so ever. The girl with the self proclaimed “V Card” reminds me of way too many snotty girls I went to high school with and the other girl who has “Commitment” problems is also just like the other girl….wow way to go diversity MTV. TX chick needs to stop worying about dudes so much and just get her education on and get the fuck out of Madison. The drunk guy, I’m sure he’ll pull a me and drink most of college away into a blunder but still mange to pull through, I’m rooting for him. The other 2 people, completly borring, I hope one chick gets rid of that douchbag ex boyfriend so she can go ride Bucky Badger for her first time 
Sweet D becomes my friend and associate. Thanks Mike.
You’re just jealous that you’re not as cool as Kevin… or Sweet D. And the only reason you like Alex is because she’s utterly miserable.
sarah m
Ummmmm, maybe you should try getting the names right before you write and publish and article online… Andrea’s ex-boyfriend’s name is Josh. Not Jordan, dumbass.
alli h
overall i feel that is a very accurate representation of the people on the show… except maybe an overestimate on Kevin. How the heck did he even get into madison? he belongs at one of the community colleges at best.
as a native sconnie and current badger I am disgusted with the way MTV represented this amazing university. yes we drink. a lot. and we party. a lot. but there is not that much drama… at any college! and i can confirm your suspicions of it being scripted. MTV paid justin to get the tattoo, and also later in the show told one of the girls to cheat on her boyfriend. she refused and ended up having to hire a lawyer to get out of the contract. i dont know for sure but im guessing alex isn’t really failing a class that was just added to create more drama (kevin really is though those grade sheets are legit).
i just wish they could have done a better job… i give it 5 episodes before the lack of audience causes MTV to take it off the air
tracy walters
i think andrea is so hot an alex is close to where i live lol
Mike L.
I like this show. Its not a very accurate depiction of all the aspects of college life, but does get some of them. Then again, I’m from Madison, so I enjoy the show for the sheer fact that it takes place in a city I know very well as well.
Mike L.
Also I don’t think that they show agood representation of Madisonm at all. I don’t even understand how Kevin could get into Madison. THe school is ridiculously hard to get into, and all he talks about is how he is getting wasted all the time and failing his math class. Madison is one of the top universities in the country, and I wish it were represented better on the show. Yeah it is a huge party school and people drink there quite a bit, but they still go to Madison, so obviously most of them have to have a decent work ethic and get their stuff done.
red brody
love this show
Bret P
Madison is not one of the top univerities in the country and it is not hard to get into – well maybe by American standards. Entry requirements are far tougher in places like Australia and England. I have been to university in all 3 places. No one on this show is particularly bright yet they all fo into Madison. You figure it out.
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I was so bored watching this. So. Bored.