Editor’s note: It is with my deepest sincerity that I apologize to you, dear reader, as well as the entire NYU Local community, and more importantly, Ms. Spears herself. Yesterday was not only the pop star’s album release for Circus, but it was also her birthday—a fact that went completely ignored on our humble site. Happy belated, Brit Brit.

In an effort to atone, today will hereby be known as Britney Spears Day. Cheetos for everyone. Justin Spees is up first with his b-day wishes. Josh Becker will follow later this afternoon.

As my friend Tuan pointed out, the new Britney Spears single “If You Seek Amy” is a phonetic approach to sidestepping the FCC. It works though, it really does; if you say “If you seek Amy” really fast it kind of sounds like “F-U-C-K me,” which makes a lot more sense in context than all the boys wanting to be modifications of the possibility that “you”—me?—wants to find Amy.

Despite the fact that her continued relevance to popular music further delays my boyhood dreams of seeing her naked, I’m pleased about this. We’ve been playing this uncomfortable game with her for a long time now–as much as she was accused of sinking teenage morality or whatever, she never actually promised to do anything more than dance–and it’s finally sort of over. Still waiting for R. Kelly to reinvent her entirely.