City - by Josh Becker on Wednesday, October 7, 2009 9:30 - 13 Comments - 796 views
If you clicked this link, I assume that means you’re a curious gay man looking to explore this city’s fabulous gay nightlife. Let me preface this by bursting your bubble; there is nothing fabulous about gay clubbing. Seriously. It’s all seminal odors and overpriced drinks and snotty door bitches and creepy forty-year-olds who try to stick their hands down your pants on neighboring windowsills and embarrassing Facebook photos that you have to untag because, you know, not like your boss is homophobic but it’d probably be best if she didn’t see these anyway. But it’s something that I think all gay NYU guys should try, because New York is probably the best place to go clubbing in the first place, so you all may as well take advantage.
(P.S. I’m not including lesbian bars here. Sorry ladies. There’s an NYU Local lesbian bar crawl this Thursday though, details of which will emerge later this week. Consider that to be a hands-on post.)
Eastern Bloc in Alphabet City is my favorite of the city’s gay bars. It successfully walks the line between dance-y club and intimate bar; with stripper poles and a large dance floor, there’s plenty of room to get down to the often-excellent playlists of gay standards (“Gloria,” anyone?) but the bar itself is also long enough to have plenty of room to order that third cosmo. Plus, they give out free condoms. I don’t feel that bad about myself when I go here.
The one and only time I went to Rush on a Thursday night — the unofficial underage-party night in the gay club scene — to boot, there were about ten people there, half of which were overweight drag queens, and I ended up going back to Queens with a Brazilian immigrant who had a Chris Kirkpatrick afghan on his bed. But whatever, it’s not Splash.
Oh god, Splash. It’s down the block from Rush, but it’s a world away at the same time. Ten dollars (five if you’re cute, free if you don’t have an STI) gets you into this hellhole. And yes, I often paid that amount freshman year, shut up. Mondays are Musical Mondays, when they play dance remixes of Broadway show tunes, and also your testosterone turns to estrogen and ketamine is practically on tap. Thursdays is College Night, when you’ll probably spot that sexually ambiguous kid who lives down the hall whom you’ve been afraid to make a move on because, you know, what if he’s straight? Well now you know, all thanks to Splash. This place sucks but you really have to go here, at least once, or else your gayness doesn’t count.
Phoenix is back in the East Village, where the gay bars are much more tolerable. Apparently this place can get pretty nuts (ha), but whenever I’m here it’s almost empty, which, frankly, is fine; the pool table in back and refreshingly decent jukebox lend themselves to a laid-back vibe not usually seen in clubes de la salchicha. A nice place to start or end your night.
If you live in Brooklyn, do not despair! You just may live by the best gay bar in New York. It’s called Metropolitan, and while the place loses something when its awesome (and huge) smoking deck closes down (or at least becomes undesirable) in the winter, you’ll still find the largest quantity of non-lecherous, very-good-looking guys here. Plus, the door woman is totally sweet, and the drinks are strong. I rarely see straight (ha) when I leave Metropolitan. It’s worth noting that this is more of a hanging-with-friends place than a picking-up-a-trick place. (Do gay people still use that term, “trick”?)
It’s more of a restaurant than a bar, but Vynl is simply wonderful. The one on 9th Ave and 50th St. plays Gwen Stefani music videos on a giant projector screen, has Madonna- and Cher-themed bathrooms, and serves some of the most delicious (and fruitiest) beverages this side of Jamba Juice — you won’t believe there’s alcohol in there. But there is, as evidenced by the impromptu dance parties that seem to spring up every night, around closing time. Be forewarned: this is a restaurant (food’s okay), not a bar, so they can get away with jacking up the drink prices. Try flirting with any of the gorgeous waiters, and see if he won’t give you a discount.
13 Comments
Jacob Hentoff
Jacob Hentoff
* by in the club, I obviously mean does my gayness count. Spare me, its 5pm already in London.
–Jacob
Josh…these are not good Gay Clubs in NY…
G-Lounge 19th St between 7th and 8th. A pretty good bar, with different themes every night of the week. Sundays is usually the fullest for the Kute party, and good looking GoGos and 2 4 1 drinks on Sundays. Generally pretty fun and easy to meet people.
Boiler Room – 4th st and 2nd ave- If you want a good East Village gay experience, this is it. It’s a cool place with lots of the cool east village non Chelsea gays. It’s fun and cheap drinks. And there are good looking people as well as a chill atmosphere. As well as comfortable couches.
Tuesday Nights – B Bar – 4th and Bowery- Beige is the name of the party. One of my favorite parties of the week. Always packed with successful good looking crowd and a celebrity about every other week. It’s awesome during the warm weather because of the Patio, kind of slows down during the colder times, but it’s always fun to just sit back and chill with your friends. You’d be surprised who you’d see there!
Tuesday Nights – Barracuda – 22nd and 8th ave – My friend Zoe Murphy throws a Karaoke party here every Tuesday. Very good looking crowd and Karaoke! Barracuda is also just a good bar to go to whenever you can’t find anywhere else to go.
Wednesday Nights- Drip @ The Grace Hotel 45th St between 6th and 7th ave. A pool party. It gets dangerous and there are mermaids. Be careful about what goes on in the bathrooms…
Thursday Nights – Key Club @ Room Service – $5 entry – My friend Tony throws this party and it’s generally a good time. Good looking successful crowd. Fun time and close to campus.
Friday Nights- Rockit @ Amalia Lounge – 55th St Between 7th ave and Broadway. Same type of crowd as Key Club but filled to the brim with your typical Chelsea guys and lots of good looking foreigners. Good music, but usually waaay too crowded to dance.
Also on Fridays there is possilby Mr Black’s (Which is in it’s 4th installment after getting repeatedly shut down everywhere it goes) @ Room Service, I haven’t been there yet but it’s supposed to be a good time. The tranny who worked the door at the old one was very, very angry.
Saturday night- Don’t go out. Full of Bridge and Tunnel
Sunday Night – The best of the week is on Sunday
Hiro @ The Maritime Hotel – 16th St and 9th ave. – Full of good looking guys. Great house music. It gets packed as well, especially on weekends. Free entry, kind of hard on IDs, but a great time. I forget how good looking the crowd is every time I go.
Vandam @ Greenhouse – Varick and Vandam – One of the best parties period here in NYC. Thrown by former Club Kids Kenny Kenny and Susanne Bartsch, this is one of the best parties that NYC has going right now. A fun crazy good time filled with people dressed up in the craziest get up. A throwback to the clubbing Hay Day of NYC. Performances and celebrities frequent. Mary Kate Olsen brushed by my friends and I one night on her way to VIP, tapping my friend on the shoulder to get there. It’s good for the breeders out there too because it’s a mostly gay, but a very mixed crowd, lots of beautiful modely girls starved for attention. The doorwoman is very very nice!
I Forgot to add a few others –
Sugarland in Brookland. It’s supposed to be amazing on Friday and Saturday, but I’ve never been.
Also, Hells Kitchen aka “Hellsey” is filled with bars and such, but I never go there, so I don’t know what to recommend. The Ritz?
And You’re absolutely right Josh about Metropolitain, it’s supposed to be a good time, but i’ve never been.
Nik Dragovic
I’m officially vouching for Sugarland’s gay-club magnificence. Who can argue with Friday’s underwear party, especially with a free shot to reward your participation? Not I. This is where one goes to dance to all of those guilty pleasures without contending with a vomit-inducing crowd.
And how about The Hose? I don’t know if it qualifies as one of the best, but it seems the Alphabet City location should add to its appeal.
Wow did I fucking kill a journalist in a past life or something? This has been the WORST NYU local week for me ever. From now on I’m only posting service announcements on the subway, and maybe a rundown of food offerings at dining halls.
Jesus fucking Christ.
@Josh, I love you! I think your list was great, it just needed some help. I got a little overzealous when typing it out. I’m sorry 
@Nik The Hose is not fun, at all. Nothing even happens in the dark room. It’s just dirty. lol
Oh, and I forgot to add on Saturday, which I don’t go out on, there’s a new party called Club 57 at Providence 57th st between 8th and 9th. It’s a three floor club that’s supposed to be crazy. 10 dollar door before midnight.
Also on Thursdays, which I can’t believe I forgot, is is Main Man at B.East which is an anti gay gay party. It’s in the lower lower east side, -East Broadway and Rutgers, and is full of the hipster, east village, fashion types. It’s generally full of pushy modely girls. Last time I was there Lady Gaga was there. It’s a good time but so far away.
Also a new party that opened at The Gates (8th ave between 24th and 25th st) on Sundays that’s supposed to be a good time! It has an open bar from the first 10 minutes of every hour and no cover.
Nik Dragovic
@Cooper I acquiesce. Your New York homo-nightlife knowledge is beyond compare. I agree that The Hose isn’t great, but maybe they’re doing something right if East Village Boys insists on having every single one of their parties there. Good call on Main Man; the weekly flyers are my favorite part.
lauren jones
the door woman at metropolitan is fantastic! she gives my dog treats when i walk him past there. i’m going to tell her you guys said nice things about her!
@Nik I’d say if you want something like the Hose, go to The Cock, at least it’s fun and you are going to end up seeing something happen. EVB probably has their parties there because it’s a cheap space to rent? lol. I pride myself on my nightlife knowledge, not just of gay nights but of most of the good clubs in the city.
Mark K.
Been to RUSH – Sadly unless your in with the old man owner, you dont have a chance at hooking up with any of the cute guys. He clearly keeps them close to him with probable prospects of money, drugs etc. They guy himself looks like a science project gone wrong , frankenstein style. The music is exactly the same every single week song after song lyric after lyric. Splash on the 1st Thursday of the month does an 18+ party and its really good and you get to talk to some of these guys with out having to deal with the rush owner getting in your business
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I went to Rush one time freshman year for 15 minutes. That’s it for my gay clubbing experiences. Am I still in the club?
–Jacob