If you were to trace my academic career from high school through most of college, it would probably look a little something like this:
A History of Controversial Music Videos (NSFW) (Expanded, Because We All Have More Procrastinating To Do)April 27th, 2010 by Josh Becker
So yeah, this happened. MIA released the first single from her upcoming album (still untitled, though I’m guessing it’ll be something like “Koala Sunbathe Bombs and Starfish”). It sounds like a Green Day fan got high for the first time and decided to fuck around on GarageBand, but I’d also like to think that MIA knows what she’s doing so maybe it’ll grow on me!
Or maybe I just don’t “get it,” because I’d never associate that song with this music video, but there you go. MIA apparently just saw The Hurt Locker because the clip is all amateur-video-y and intense and concerns armed conflict. Also featured: the mass slaughtering of a group of ginger boys, a time-worn man smoking some illegal drug, full frontal nudity, sex, violence against women, and exploding limbs. Man, if they ever make a Grand Theft Auto movie, Romain Gavras (the guy who helmed the French-ghetto gobstopper of a video for Justice’s “Stress”) has got to direct, amirite?
Anyway, if you need to kill a few minutes because you’d rather suffer an aneurysm than continue studying, here are some other controversial music videos from times past and present for you to enjoy:
First and foremost, Burger King is now testing a brunch menu at locations in Florida, Massachusetts, and Canada. Yes, that includes virgin mimosas. You’ll also be able to order a ciabatta sandwich, complete with scrambled egg, cheese, tomato, ham, and bacon. Yeah, ham and bacon. Pull quote: “The final element of the brunch menu in test markets is that BK’s signature Whopper burger is available during the morning.”
If, like me, you still don’t have concrete job plans once you graduate, consider starting a Quiznos! All you need is five thousand dollars and a desire to be crappier than Subway. They’ll lay down the rest of the money, and once your Quiznos becomes a big hit, you can pay them back. Or else just sue them for forcing you into financial ruin.
Midtown is getting a Shake Shack! And that Shake Shack is getting a pretzel-flavored concrete. A concrete is the Shack’s take on the DQ Blizzard. “Pretzel! The Concrete” features chocolate custard, peanut butter, chocolate covered pretzels, and “marshmallow sauce.” They also have a jelly doughnut flavor.
- NYU Abu Dhabi panel – m4w – 22 - Is this what you lil’ imperialists are gonna learn out there? Fortune telling? Okay. Just checking.
- Kimmel Pasta Line – m4w – 21 – Ugh, there was this total creep standing behind me in the past line today. Yeah, the one at Kimmel. He kept breathing through his mouth like Brainy from Hey Arnold. He told the chef he wanted “what the cute lass in front of me ordered.” He was worse than that weirdo who wanted me to baptize his sneakers at the fortune telling panel.
- skateboarder outside NYU Weinstein – w4m – 22 – “You were cute, but probably a freshman or something, knowing my luck.” Did you hear that beggars can’t be choosing? Writing a Missed Connections post on craigslist pining for a skateboarder outside Weinstein, by the way, is called “begging.”
- F Asian Columbia Student on 1 train last night 8 pm – m4w – Dammit, why do all the “AA guys” hang out by Columbia? There are so many more bars down here, come on guys!
- Palladium Swimmer – m4m – 30 – When he says “you and I ran into each other,” he means “I cornered you in the locker room shower.”
I assume you know what happened in Fulton, Mississippi, but in case you don’t: Constance McMillen is a lesbian high school senior who was made to attend a phony prom with her girlfriend and some disabled people while the cool, straight students had their own party a half hour away. Parents and school administrators apparently helped the str8s plan their secret party.
I am a senior at IAHS, and I’ve known Constance for the last 6 years. Please hear our side of the story before you decide on our fate.?The party we had in Evergreen (the county neighborhood I live in) is 30 mins away from the school. we rented out the community center, hired vendors, decorated, and our parents ran the security/chaperone staff- but it wasn’t prom. Prom was at the country club where constance and 7 other students were. The reason the senior class boycotted the actual prom was not because we hate gays.
We here at NYU may be the fifth saddest school in the country, but we’re most certainly not the fifth most stressed. We’re 24th.
Going by criteria that included cost, competitiveness, and, um, having a “particularly rigorous graduate engineering program,” the U.S. News and World Report rankings said that Stanford is the most stressed-out school. How could Stanford kids be so stressed? I thought everyone in California smoked a lot of weed or something!
Columbia, MIT, UPenn, and Harvard round out the top five, while Vanderbilt University makes a surprise appearance at number seven. NYU is apparently less stressed out than Tufts. For real? I mean, it’s just, we live in Manhattan. Isn’t stress as ubiquitous as Starbucks and instances of public intoxication?
Maybe we’re so (relatively) relaxed because we reject students who compare life to a game of Monopoly, and “as long as you keep your piece on the board, you will remain successful.” But what if I need to mortgage Park Place to pay back my student loans? And then I land on your hotel at somewhere gay like St. Charles Place. That’s how life works, I think.
Anyway, Brian (he wrote that New York Times post I just linked to, in case you are the worst NYU Local reader and didn’t click it): go to DePaul! They’re apparently happier than the rest of us.
How do you gauge happiness? Not by a smile and not by a song; apparently, you just randomly ask students if they feel happy, to which they answer yes or no, and then you see which college had the most “yes” answers.
The Princeton Review determined Clemson University to have the happiest students back in 2009. (It was also named the number one “jock school” in the country, for what it’s worth.)
But wait! “Undergraduate research” at California’s Mission College Mesa, which I have just determined to have the funniest homepage photo in the country, decided to conduct its own happiest-students survey. Mission College Mesa does not place in the top ten.
According to these anonymous and probably stoned undergrads, DePaul University has the happiest students, thanks to, among other things, its “rock-solid pre-professional instruction.” Funny, I thought all colleges offered “pre-professional instruction” but HEY, what do I know? Maybe I’m just jealous because I go to the fifth least happiest school. Fifth least happiest! That is almost certainly going to be the name of my shoegaze-emocore quartet.
Guys, crime. It’s everywhere! And I don’t just mean ethical crimes like not tipping your cabbie but real, actual, take-a-bite-out-of-it crime. Think campus was safe during spring break? Better trim your mental bushes, son, ‘cuz I’m about to blow your mind.
March 10, 11:40am, Henry Kaufman Management Center/44 W 4th St.: “On time and date of report, a faculty member states that between 9:20am and 10:55am on date of report, 40 student exam papers were removed from her. Complainant is unsure if she had locked her office. There was no visible indication of forcible entry.” I’m going to take a wild guess and say that no, her office wasn’t locked, since the thief did not apparently have to break into her office to take the exams. Read more…
For a site that gets 600 million monthly hits, many advertisers are reluctant to associate their products with the bawdy reputation that 4chan has developed over the years. According to moot, he breaks even each month, with a majority of his revenues going towards the enormous server requirements the constantly-updated image board requires. Yes, he does a little consulting work on the side, too. Sadly, nudkipz are not very profitable on their own. No, he doesn’t want to do this forever. Though he’s unsure of his career plans, he wants to major in anthropology, sociology, or the like. And at 22, he’s begun to have to face these decisions; despite his recent plans to update the image board, he acknowledges that 4chan probably won’t be around forever. If (and when?) he does end 4chan, moot will leave behind a legacy of notorious, offensive, and oddly impressive technical prowess employed simply “for the lulz” (translation: for its own/humor’s/boredom’s sake), like when 4chan users made the swastika Google’s top trending topic for a brief period on a summer day in 2008. Put that in your résumé and smoke it!
Today, I met moot. He’s the guy who runs 4chan, the image board that’s spawned such magnificent memes as Pedobear and the Rickroll.
I’m taking a class called Hackers: Culture and Politics — which I heartily recommend, though I can’t guarantee that the world’s most influential person will visit each semester — and today, moot (real name, possibly, Christopher Poole) stopped by for a Q&A. In a brief introduction he complained about constantly having to explain what 4chan is when he gives talks at places like the TED Conference and Yale University. After that, our professor opened up the floor for questions from the class. Here are a few things I learned from his answers:
When Ben Goldwasser and Andrew VanWyngarden told us back in January that there was to be no standout single with crossover potential—no “Kids” or “Time to Pretend,” in other words—on their new album Congratulations, people started to worry. Did a lack of singles imply an abandonment of the clever, catchy songwriting that made Oracular Spectacular such a success?
A few weeks later, two songs from the single-less album found their way online, and they seemed to confirm Ben and Andrew’s warning. “Flash Delirium” isn’t a party-started like “Electric Feel” but rather a hazy mid-tempo track that aggregated a strange cacophony of sounds: a bossa-nova into gives way to a flute solo, a group chant, organs borrowed f rom “Surfin’ USA,” and ambiguous lyrics about “blank dreams of the coming fun.” The song ends with a fiery coda, all of its musical elements crashing into each other as VanWyngarden commands us to “sue the spiders, sink the Welsh, stab your Facebook, sell, sell, sell.” Was MGMT angry at the commercialism into which they’d entered, or just really stoned?
Album closer “Congratulations,” on the other hand, was a slow-burner, calypso chillwave for Brooklyn listeners. Goldwasser’s gently rhythmic guitar strums wouldn’t sound out of place at a sunset beach bonfire; a regular bassline winds its way down the G scale; VanWyngarden articulates the song’s mellow fatigue, claiming to be “dead in the water” and going “out with a wimper.” Indeed, the song is “not a blaze of glory,” which makes the golf-clap applause at the end all the more ambiguous. These two tracks seemed to signal a Kurt Cobain perspective on the band’s sudden, newfound, and perhaps unexpected success; these weren’t tracks for the Top-40 set.